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How to Silence Your Inner Critic

Posted on December 14, 2022
inner critic

We’ve all experienced bullying in our lives, whether it be personally or vicariously. 41% of American adults have been victims of cyberbullying. Subjects of bullies are targeted and taunted, potentially leaving them feeling insecure and vulnerable. The next thing you know, the bully gets off feeling powerful and in control. But what happens when the bully is no longer in gym class with us and becomes a part of our inner world?

Silencing Your Inner Critic

The inner critic can take many forms but remains consistent in a negative tone. Anything you do can be called into question as your inner critic reviews your life with a fine-tooth comb, pointing out any missteps while suggesting possible landslides in the future. The question holds fast: who invited this bully to the table?

Let’s show them the door. Here is how you can start overcoming your inner critic.

1) Get to the root of the problem.

Facing your demons can be a drag, whether in person or really IN person (internally). We all have internal voices – however, sometimes these can be saboteurs, and you have to take a stand to silence your inner critic. Ask yourself: When did it first show up? In what situations do they pop up for a visit? This might take some reflection, but when you find the answer, you will see the light at the end of the tunnel.

As we know, bullies usually bully because they have hurt themselves, but in this case, the inner critic is a product of our consciousness. And as much as they cause unpleasant feelings, they may need a little LOVE themselves. How did they get so rough around the edges? Sometimes our inner critic tries to protect us by preventing us from being vulnerable. However, vulnerability is key to living fully, and they may not realize that. So, you can tell them if you want.

2) Make room at the table for some friendly faces.

Support systems are so important both internally and externally. This is why working with a life coach can be so powerful. Surround yourself with people who BUILD YOU UP. Notice how you feel when people put you down (even jokingly) because “What if there is an ounce of truth in that joke?” (hint, hint — that’s the inner voice talking). Notice if your friends are also friends with your inner critic. Sometimes when people are insecure, they point out your flaws in a silly way, and guess who gets the biggest kick out of that? Yep, it’s that inner critic again.

So, if you have a kick-butt support team, your inner critic starts feeling unpopular and like they do not fit in (a bully’s worst nightmare). Remember: to silence it; you need a strong inner voice. This concept can also be applied internally, drawing on models from positive psychology.

Where are the parts of yourself that say: “You can do this!” “You look gorgeous today!” “You aced that client call!” “Why don’t you get a good night’s sleep so that you have a refreshing start to your day?” “It’s okay that you had a bad day; feelings are temporary!”? Find those inner parts and CHOOSE to spend more time hearing their encouragement; this is how to boost self-confidence. A classic inner coach vs. internal critic scenario will give the inner critic less time to monopolize the convo. Positive attracts positive!

3) Discover your strengths and play to them.

Do you know the feeling of being “one with the music” or when “time stops”? These phrases describe flow states, where you are just BEING, not thinking. Do things that bring you to the present moment. Once you discover these situations, incorporate your strengths. Flow states +strengths = unstoppable and a perfect way to silence your inner critic. This voice may see this as a good opportunity for a vacation — IF they don’t wholly retire — in which case, no worries! Despite what this inner voice tells you, your inner world is a judgment-free zone.

Tomorrow is a new day.

Silencing Your Inner Critic Through Coaching

Coaching can provide an opportunity to work on silencing your inner critic. A coach can help guide you through this process.

Coaching can also equip you with tools and perspectives that help dissolve self-limiting beliefs and thoughts, enabling you to bring a more positive attitude towards yourself. As you become aware of your negative thoughts and begin to practice self-compassion, your inner critic will start to fade away. Ultimately, the goal is to replace criticism with compassion so you can move forward in life feeling supported and empowered.

A good coach understands that building the mental strength needed to silence your inner critic takes time and effort. With patience, dedication, and a willingness to learn, you can regain control of your thoughts and create a more positive environment. Through this process of self-discovery, you can ultimately start living life on your terms without letting any negative voices hold you back.

So, how about you? How do you turn off your inner critic? Please leave your comments in the section below.