Being self-aware doesn’t just mean knowing who you are. Sure, that’s part of it—but more importantly, it means understanding your thoughts, emotions, motives, and habits, and perceiving them as others would.
Self-aware individuals make for great coaches because they cultivate a crucial trait: presence.
How Self-Awareness Strengthens Coaching Presence
In the Co-Active framework, presence means being fully engaged in the moment: open, attentive, and responsive. Self-awareness directly strengthens presence by helping coaches regulate emotions, listen deeply, and empathize with clients and others.
The Power of Presence, an ICF study, explores presence as a foundational coaching skill. In it, Dr. Ann Van Eron notes,
“Self-aware coaches are not just aware of the client—they are aware of themselves, which allows them to adjust responses, notice subtle cues, and create a more meaningful dialogue.”
Eron explains that effective coaches focus their awareness on three areas:
- Self: Awareness of your own emotions, biases, and internal state.
- Others: Sensitivity to the client’s energy, words, and unspoken cues.
- Context: Understanding the broader environment shaping the conversation.
It’s no coincidence that self comes first. As Eron puts it, “We all have the capacity to be self-aware, but we most often run on automatic in our everyday lives in the clutches of habitual patterns of behavior.”
She’s right: Research from Harvard Business Review found that only about 15% of people are truly self-aware. That’s a concern for coaches, who can’t support clients fully without reflection and awareness of their own triggers.
Becoming more self-aware—and, in turn, more present—is a worthy goal for anyone, but especially for coaches. The journey requires inner work, but the result (a deeper, more authentic coaching presence) will be worth it.
What Does “Inner Work” Mean for a Coach?
Inner work is the ongoing process of self-reflection, examining beliefs, understanding triggers, and cultivating emotional awareness. It’s how coaches strengthen their self-awareness and presence.
Practical ways to engage in inner work include:
- Journaling to recognize emotional patterns and reactions
- Meditation or mindfulness to cultivate presence
- Supervision or peer reflection to gain an outside perspective
- Personal or professional coaching to explore blind spots
Eron describes inner work as iterative, saying, “…the process of cultivating self-awareness is ongoing and deepens over a coach’s career.”
Ready to do the Inner Work? Start Here.
Inner work isn’t always convenient or comfortable; it’s called work for a reason.
It requires noticing habits you’d rather ignore, facing emotions that feel messy, and questioning assumptions you’ve long taken for granted. But leaning into this discomfort is exactly what allows coaches to grow.
Eron offers a series of powerful, research-backed practices that help coaches strengthen their self-awareness and expand their presence.
- Seek new experiences. Expose yourself to new ideas, people, and places to expand your perspective and see new possibilities.
- Ask for honest feedback. Learn how your actions and energy affect those around you, like your colleagues, family, and friends.
- Practice empathy and forgiveness. Extend compassion to yourself and others—growth requires grace.
- Revisit your habits. Strengthen those that serve you and ditch those that don’t.
- Reflect and experiment. Take time to reflect, then try new behaviors with a coach or trusted peers.
- Share your aspirations. Being open about your dreams builds accountability and connection.
- Notice recurring patterns. If the same frustrations or regrets show up again and again, explore what they reveal about your assumptions or blind spots.
- Cultivate positivity. Gratitude, optimism, and hope are contagious (and create a more supportive coaching presence!).
- Clarify your values. What matters most to you? Align your actions with those values.
- Create a vision for yourself, your clients, and your organization, and take small, meaningful steps toward it.
- Engage with difference. Learn from those who see the world differently; this expands your empathy and widens your lens as a coach.
Eron reminds us that inner work isn’t abstract—it’s embodied, relational, and practiced daily. These practical steps help coaches deepen their self-awareness, strengthen their presence, and model the same courage and openness they hope to inspire in their clients.
Witness Self-Awareness in Action
Need one more boost of inspiration to put these practices into action?
See the power of self-awareness and inner work brought to life in John Henry Everett’s Transformational Story.